I
used to ponder on why
my
"better half" let me down
in
a way that always hurts
after
we made our matchless vow
to
stay for better or for worse -
until
death sets us apart
but
-
I've
learned to let go
after
all we all can only try
to
do what's right in this life
where
we come and go.
I
was then thirty
with
a youthful hue
as
fresh as dew
that
and many others
attracted
me to him and others
who
thought that I "am witty
graceful
and not cocky".
Yet,
those were not enough
to
make him stay home although
he
had cheated and
that
was not the first.
What
makes it worse
is
the onus society places
on
me the woman and not what
he
the man does in most cases
to
keep a union such as ours
from
coming to an end.
I
became to him what most men
see
in their mothers who
broke
their hymen
before
marriage who
they/society
labels whoes - not him
who
appears to have the right
to
dangle his manhood
in
every house he deems fit -
then
again - it's a man's world?
While
I dearly want to jab underfoot
the
numerous cancers of our society I
certainly cannot with a single post
although
this is a start -
so
should I live another day I
would
tell a story which might cost
me
friends and some sanity -
but
better that than permit
this
patriarchal idiocy
under
his authoritarian jackboot.
Yeah,
I doubted every time he said
"I
love you" because when he lied
he
would - with a Judas kiss.
And
he had me believe it was
because I couldn't suffice
his
most pressing manly needs
including
his fetish for blowjob.
Rather
'kind' to showcase his prop
whenever
the stage necessitated it.
Yes,
I was his showpiece when he deemed it fit -
a
day's joy was but a bubble
as
his heart seemed unattainable.
The
man who had said I do
had
become his own foe -
so
unpredictable predictable.
I
figured I was not enough
to
please and pleasure him over time
and
had to face the truth that I'm better off ...
not
living in denial and the dream
that
a man whose sisters had served
him nearly all his life -
wouldn't
be needing another "slave" christened a wife.
Because
out of his rips I was taken -
to
be his "helper", sex object and for his kitchen:
such
patriarchal nonsense
posited
by men with a double dose of insolence.
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| Stop Violence Against Women |
I
served my couch a billion tears from a bitter heart -
because
the punching, kicking, name-calling was tearing us apart
and
I prayed it would end
as
it appeared I wasn't good
to
keep him from cheating
over
and over with the bluff
that
he was going to change and
realize
that I am good enough.
He
never did and like me
you
don't need his permission
to
make the decision
not
to any longer tolerate
this
patriarchal nonsense
and
end the marriage
but
it would be painstakingly tough
and
society would take offense
because
it expects you and me
to
accept this patriarchal nonsense.
Source:cmcghana.blogspot.com/Crabbe Nathaniel
PHOTOS:
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| Malala |
